Politics

Trump To Replace Border With 300ft Chasm

Jack Nicholson Comes Out Of Retirement To Play Future Attorney General Mark Gaetz

Trump Appoints Hulk Hogan As Secretary Of Whoopin’ Ass

Biden Not Really Sure What To Do With Himself Now

News Anchors Unsure What To Talk About Now Election Is Over

State Funeral Scheduled For Peanut The Squirrel

Trump Demands Recount, Wants More Votes

Nation Braces Itself For Exciting Night Of Paper Counting

Apocalypse Imminent After [INSERT NEW PRESIDENT HERE] Wins Election

Local Man Looking Forward To Election Finishing So He “Can Go Back To Thinking About Birds”