Dumpster Fire Adjacent to Mar-a-Lago Valued at $69M

PALM BEACH, FL – A recent real estate appraisal has valued a dumpster fire located adjacent to Mar-a-Lago at a whopping $69 million. The valuation has left many scratching their heads, but local real estate agents argue it’s all about “location, location, location.”

“Look, if Mar-a-Lago is worth anywhere between $18 million and $1.5 billion, depending on who you ask, then surely a dumpster fire next door is worth $69 million,” said local realtor Sandy Goldgrabber. “It’s prime real estate. You’re essentially getting a front-row seat to all the drama.”

The dumpster, which caught fire due to an unknown cause, has become a hot commodity in the area. Potential buyers are lining up, with some even suggesting turning the site into a luxury condo tower named “Blaze Residences.”

“I’ve always wanted to live next to Mar-a-Lago,” said one eager buyer. “And now, with the added ambiance of a dumpster fire, it’s like a dream come true.”

The valuation comes on the heels of a contentious debate over the worth of Mar-a-Lago. Former President Donald Trump recently claimed the resort is worth $1.5 billion, a figure that has been met with skepticism. A New York judge even ruled that this valuation was significantly inflated, citing an appraisal report that estimated the property’s value between $18 million and $27.6 million from 2011 to 2021, as reported by Forbes.

However, Trump has been adamant about his valuation, even suggesting on his social media platform, Truth Social, that Mar-a-Lago is “WORTH 50 to 100 times” the value cited in the judge’s ruling.

In light of these developments, some locals are considering starting their own fires in hopes of cashing in on the real estate boom.

“I’ve got a rusty old barbecue in my backyard,” said local resident Joe Swindler. “If I set that ablaze, maybe I can get a cool $10 million for it. After all, it’s only a few blocks from Mar-a-Lago.”